The Fairer Sex

Girls can be horrible creatures. I would never normally show an ounce of sympathy towards the male species, but (and before you decide at this point that I am definitely a sad ugly feminist man hater, I’m not) I have to say that living in a world that is half populated by girls must be horrific. If not horrific, then baffling. Because girls behave in a way that only they understand and collectively partake in, even though it causes most of their problems.

Let me explain. Since I started going out to clubs, a series of rituals has emerged. When a group of girls enter a club, they head straight for the toilets. This doesn’t mean we are all cocaine addicts. It means we probably need the toilet and a hair fix after queuing in gale force winds for two hours, wearing a top as a dress. But the first toilet visit is also about marking territory. Groups of girls hog sections of mirror, eyeing up each others’ outfits, bitching indiscreetly about the girls downstairs who aren’t part of their ‘loo crew’.

While eye liner and blusher is frantically applied and plans of action for the night are discussed, the boys are probably sitting around the club, looking cool, sipping lagers, waiting. I wouldn’t know, because I would be in the toilet. But I imagine that boys feel extremely grown up and sensible when faced with a club full of girls trying to out-dance each other. And I know that they secretly enjoy breaking up a catfight when one too many vodka red bulls leads to Girl Number One kissing the bloke Girl Number Two really fancied two years ago, even though said bloke was never interested in either of them and just wants to go home.

I do love being a girl. I just wish that sometimes we could stop, take a look at ourselves, and realize that most of the time, we are all bickering over nothing.

Richard Cooper - Interview

At only 21 years of age, you would expect Richard Cooper to be full of himself, especially since those in the recording industry have a less than saintly reputation. On the contrary, Rich (as he is known to all) has kick started a career that most people his age can only dream of, but you wouldn’t know it from talking to him.

It’s a lazy Sunday afternoon, and I have arranged to meet Rich in The Paradise Bar, Kensal Green. He is bang on time, having come from his Abbey Road flat which he shares with two of his female friends. Greeting me ever so slightly shyly, we sit down to coffee in the warm sunshine.

Cooper has now worked at British Grove Studios in Chiswick for nearly two and a half years, as a recording engineer. He modestly counts Mark Knopfler (of Dire Straits fame) as his boss, and countless chart toppers as clients. But how did he achieve so much, so young?
“After my GCSEs, I moved to London to study at an audio engineering college which I did for nine months. I then got offered a job at Sony Studios before I finished studying because I was so young, but that place closed down soon after.”

Richard, originally from Reading, attended a very mixed state school which he deemed as
“Ok, but not particularly inspiring. I did what I had to do, then left to persue recording.”
He was almost immediately offered a job at British Grove, after achieving a “degree type-thing” from engineering college. When I again bring up his age, and his thoughts on where he is, he states matter-of-factly:

“I think it’s a lot to do with just getting on with people and being relaxed and stuff, and having a good education – actually knowing what I’m doing.”

And, I add, knowing what you want to do and having the drive to do it?

“Yes, definitely. I have been drumming and recording since I can remember. I guess I’m lucky that I left school knowing where I was headed.”

So is it all about rubbish shoulders with Amy Winehouse and attending the craziest parties? Not exactly. Cooper puts work first, but still has fun, receiving free passes and countless party invites, admitting “it’s not really like a real job, but I have to do ridiculous hours without breaks and it pretty much ruins any social life!”

And the highlights?

“I get paid pretty well, depending on who I’m working with. I loved the Razorlight sessions because they were here for six months and it was like working with friends; I got really involved. However, working with The Darkness was horrible because the producer was not the nicest person.”

Other artists who have walked through the doors of British Grove include The Killers, The Libertines, U2 and Kanye West. Cooper is clearly heading for the top of his profession, and when I ask where he wants to be in ten years time, he has a think before deciding he would like to be “in demand as an engineer, working with rock and pop bands, or just playing drums. I’m easy.” Indeed, he is an accomplished drummer, playing in the up and coming signed band Wall Street Riots (formally Death Can Dance) who we are sure to be hearing a lot more of in the future.
“We play loads of shows, have good management and just recorded with the same producer who worked with Supergrass, so it’s going really well.”

Whilst most people his age are still half-heartedly putting themselves through university, trying to decide where they want to be and building up piles of debt, I can’t help but feel slightly jealous that the person before me had it all planned out a long time ago. Richard is part of a growing crop of young, ambitious people in London making popular culture their chosen career and impressively succeeding. As we go our separate ways, I wish him luck and skip off through the capital with a refreshed faith in the concept that you can do anything you want if you really put your mind to it.

Krystle Gohel - Interview

The ‘lad’s mag’ industry is, to the outsider, a knot of male editors with an un-politically correct sense of humour, chasing after bleached blonde women with fake breasts - among other things. In reality, what’s found is a community of arguably the nicest and most down to earth people within the magazine world, one of whom I am lucky enough to meet today.

Krystle Gohel is a former Page3 girl (she has over thirty Page3 appearances under her belt) and current lads mag hottie-turned-make-up artist. She is, quite frankly, the total opposite of what I had in mind. Her chatty, friendly, quirky comments are delivered in a girly Manchester accented voice and you know right away that she is oblivious of her charms. She is a mixture of contradictions; scatty but professional, indecisive but determined, and innocently sweet but exotically sexy. She is dressed in a way which suggests she is completely comfortable with her body and her image, and manages to make a black vest, jeans and a scarf look ridiculously sexy. Her Greek and Spanish heritage gives her a striking look not often found among glamour girls, but ensured she won the Sun’s Page3 Idol competition in 2003, keeping male fans very happy for the duration of her successful two-year stint as one of the paper’s most in demand girls. That same year, she went on to win FHM’s Student of the Year, earning her a solid place within the profession of glamour modeling. As none of this was planned nor expected, she was suddenly obliged to choose between her university education and her fledging modeling career.
“I started modeling half way through my degree in Fashion Marketing, then [after several course changes] changed to HND, finally completing it. I decided to do modeling full time, but was not satisfied after a few months of not using my brain, and went back to university!”
She went on to graduate in 2006, aged 23, with a degree in Media Design at Manchester Metropolitan University.

We meet at a halfway point, in the home of her model friend with whom she shared this very flat with during her early London days. I can instantly tell that the small space holds many happy, if not so well remembered memories for the girls. Photos of parties, holidays, festivals and general shenanigans crowd the walls in the tiny but neat kitchen area. We settle into a bright yellow sofa propped up against a clean white wall, and she kicks off her shoes, curling her legs underneath her. Her wide innocent smile and inviting body language make me warm to this unlikely glamour star instantly.

A year ago, after struggling to know what to do with her life and unsure of the perfect career choice, Krystle decided to throw herself back into the magazine industry – but with a different goal: “I moved to London and got a full time job, which I hated, to cover my rent, and took evening courses for a diploma in make-up and hair.”
She has now settled in London and has been an in-demand make-up artist for just under a year. Does she feel that her modeling career gave her a head start in finding work? “Yes, I would totally agree.” She pauses to take a lady-like drag of her cigarette. “I am very fortunate to know people in the industry, and they are my friends, which gave me the chance to show I am good at what I do.”

Indeed, this business is all about helping each other out. The models, stylists, and photographers alike have such a sense of passion and frivolity in what they do which makes the glamour industry so inviting to so many girls. One independent men’s magazine, Front, commission Krystle as make-up artist in almost every photo shoot they organize. The photos are often shot by former Page3 girl-turned-photographer Zoë McConnell, another close friend of Krystle’s. And you can bet your bottom dollar that the cover girl they are working with is a close acquaintance.
“I think my job is the best job. I love it! I am very lucky to meet the people I do and have the opportunity to work with creatives alike. It’s taken nearly 10 years and several university courses to get here, but I wouldn’t change a thing!”

After just under a year of working, Krystle can count herself as a regular contributor to Maxim and Front, among others. She recently worked for the Guinness World Records where she met the woman with the longest legs and the smallest man in the world, calling it “quite an eye opener!”
What makes her instantly likeable is her grounded attitude and youthful enthusiasm. She tells me that for all the girls in college training to become a part of the industry, very few are employed. This is because, quite simply, someone who is older, with experience in the same or similar field, will always get the work first and foremost. In this way she is glad that it took her so long to find a job which makes her happy.

“Every make-up job I do is my best achievement!” She suddenly becomes animated with enthusiasm, and her eyes sparkle. “It is so rewarding when you know that you put 110% into your work and everyone is pleased with the whole outcome.”
It is clear that she has indeed found her perfect career; one that suits her care-free, excitable, creative personality down to the ground. The only downside she can think of, after a wrinkle of her nose, is the fact that the weight of her make-up case and the London tubes cause some problems. “I’m quite small and it’s very rare for a kind gentleman to help you up or down the stairs during London rush hour!”

What else would I expect, then, when I ask her the obligatory where-in-five-years question? A sudden widening of the eyes, followed by the exclamation: “I want to be the best make-up artist in the WORLD!” seems to establish her point, and she springs off her seat to make us some more tea.